Kings Lynn stage 1 – Kings Lynn to Great Bircham (26km)
With an early start at 7am on Saturday 21st March 2026, three Pheasants set out for Great Bircham to deposit one of their cars. Early mist was soon dispersed once Mario located the heating button in the legendary Toyota and by the time Great Bircham appeared glorious sun greeted the team.
A quick change of cars into the Bellars support vehicle soon had the team back in King’s Lynn at The Walks Park. The start was in front of the fabulous and historic Red Mount Chapel, and heralded the first of a two stage walk to the now traditional end point of Walsingham. Yet again, the flock found themselves in the middle of a park run event. Bellars gamely joined the two wanderers for a loop around the park, waving off the indomitable duo of Tom and Mario before heading back to bed.
The initial urban section of the walk took the walkers through Gaywood which turned out to harbour numerous small Muntjac deer. Mario tried the Dr Dolittle approach to charm these animals before it became apparent that they only responded to bribes of chips. One thing a Pheasant does not part with is food.
Leaving the deer behind to munch on their fried spuds, the team were soon passing through South and North Wotton along with pleasant wooded sections and open vistas. Red Kites were in abudance either due to the keen eyes of Mario or conversely Mario’s habit to call nearly all birds Red Kites (which they were). Eitherway the Pheasants appreciated their avian companions as they soared above the open plains on the path to Castle Rising.
Castle Rising was picturesque in the early Spring sun, with beautiful buildings and real pheasants on hand to cheer the team on as they took a break at the local Tea Room. Taking time to enjoy scones (Strawberry/White Chocolate) and stocking up on pocket meat for the journey, the duo were loathed to leave the comfortable surroundings including fancy toilet and first class serving team.
With their bellies full, the Pheasants soon displayed how nimble they could be with a mad dash across the busy A149 before disappearing into woods like ghosts. The next couple of miles towards Flitcham followed a tranquil river section, allowing for quiet reflection time while still well aware that lunchtime was fast approaching.
A lunch stop on a quiet verge allowed the duo to tuck into pocket meat along with performing the much heralded 10km “to go” dance. With camera in place and rehearsals completed, a highly dangerous set of dance maneuvers were enacted. It was thought to be the first recorded evidence of the dance since the unfortunate BGT audition when the previous example was dropped from television schedules after it was deemed unsuitable for pre 9pm watershed and legal action by Simon Cowell.
From this point onwards energy levels dropped rapidly as the team reached Anmer and the local church of Kate and Wills Windsor. This left a hard and dispiritingly straight 5km slog to Great Bircham, cutting across the familiar Peddars Way and the welcome sight of the finish line. This final path has entered Pheasant folklore for its unkind nature, being potholed and rock strewn, causing the Pheasants to suffer foot blisters of unprecedented size.
Arriving safely back to the welcome sight of the Toyota and the nearby King’s Head pub/hotel, Mario and Tommy took the opportunity to recover and enjoy some refreshments to the sounds of the local barflies’ increasingly loud and tall tales
